Do guys have this much fun?

Picking up guys could never be this complicated.

With girls, you have to be pretty enough, and feminine enough. You have to make the move but it has to seem like it was an accident. You have to get lost from your friends, or be rescued from a pursuer. You have to be funny enough so you can giggle real close to one another, so you can catch her eyes as you catch your breath and realize that you're still holding her arm. So you can smile shyly and sweetly as you let her go and pretend something else has caught your attention. But of course she's got your  attention. Because you're noticing if she's looking at you while you're looking away. And you notice how readily she takes your hand as you turn back to her. You tell her how pretty she looks, or how adorable her dress is, with a hint of surprise, like the idea just popped into your head. And you make eye contact with a guy behind her so that he thinks he has a chance and comes to dance with you. And you let him press his body against you so that you, in turn, can press yours against hers. Until you make a face to show you're bored of him, and you laugh together and tuck into the crowd. But now you're close dancing. You lean into her and your cheeks brush for the first time. As you pull back you look to the ground and take a quick breath in before you look at her. And now she thinks for the first time there might be something between you. You let your breath out as if to shake off the thought and keep dancing. But now she's extra aware of where your hands are, and you make sure to keep them appropriate. But when you lean in again and your cheeks brush for the second time you run your hand through her hair and you graze your hand along the back of her neck. You keep your hand steady and your mouth slightly open as you pull back, only enough to look at her. You look at her mouth and then you hold her gaze. And now you can tell. You can tell if you've done enough. If you haven't you shake it off and keep your confidence. Pretending to be unaware of how such a silly thought could cross your mind. But if you have. If you have done enough. Been pretty enough, feminine, funny and casual enough. Then you hold her gaze and you pull her in and let your lips just barely touch hers. Slightly parted, just for a moment. Because now she's in and she wants to and she's curious but you hesitate. You hold off for a fraction of a second. And when you finally kiss her lightly she doesn't know if it was you or her. For all she knows it might have been her who came onto you. You keep kissing and let your hands roam staying keen to any resistance she might give. Reacting quickly to her body so that's she's comfortable again before she even knew that she wasn't, making her trust your hands. And now she's yours, and you can kiss her like you've wanted to since she first caught your eye.